If you read yesterday’s post, I mentioned why I’ve been a bit MIA on the blog. My journey of living with cancer continues. Over the years, I’ve come to see that one chapter finishes and a new chapter begins. Treatments work than they stop, tumors shrink, than they grow…it’s definitely a rollercoaster ride but I continue to count my blessings that I remain on track and along the way, there are still many moments of joy, as I don’t take life for granted. What may look like “little things” that you forget to be thankful for, you look back in the past and realize those “little things” are actually “big things”. Always remember that.
Over the years, I’ve been fighting ovarian cancer with chemo, hormonal therapy, multiple surgeries, ablation, and a clinical trial. I continue my battle…on February 27th, I underwent radiation treatments. While I felt I was prepared on what to expect during these treatments, I was still nervous. Mainly because I despise feeling nauseous – which was one of the side effects (since the tumor is in my abdomen area) and the other was having to hold my breath for up to 30 seconds. I can’t tell you how difficult it was – to hold your breath for what feels like you are going to pass out, gave me such anxiety, literally. I felt my face warm up, I felt my heart beat slower, and I felt my chest tighten. It’s was an awful feeling for me – I don’t know how swimmers do it! But I made it through my treatments and was so happy when I completed my last one! I got to ring the bell three times to let it be known, I have completed treatments. The sign on the bell plague read the following:
Ring this bell,
Three times well
It’s toll to clearly say…
My treatments done,
The course is run
And, I am on my way.
Ringing the bell felt like such an accomplishment – I did it! Ring that bell, girl!
On May 1st, I will undergo a CT exam to see if the radiation worked in shrinking the largest tumor on my liver. I’m feeling positive about the results but I’ve learned not to put too much focus on exam days until the day is near. Daily prayer from me and others is what gets me through challenging times. I feel so blessed to receive such continued love and support by my spouse, my family and closest friends but even more special when it comes from my readers and the community on instagram who don’t know me on a personal level but show such care! You guys really know how to make a girl feel good – thank you!!
For all those fighting a battle – keep fighting and stay strong…we can do this! There will be times when you are in a funk, when you just want to cry or crawl into bed – you are allowed to take rest but on those days, don’t let your mind or spirit contain you in that feeling of despair. Figure out ways to uplift your spirits. For me, some of the things I do to help me is talk it out with my partner, cry it out if I have to, I read my daily inspiration of prayer, and I delve into things I love to do to keep my spirits up and my heart happy. Spring is coming – you can clear your mind by taking a casual stroll, while listening to your favorite songs or an inspirational podcast. Create a moodboard of all that you want to do this year that gives you a visual – sometimes seeing a collage of your favorite things to do or see can calm you and bring happy to your heart. It’s a wonderful feeling to have something to look forward to! If there is something you do to help you get out of a funk or would like to share some ideas, feel free to comment in the comments section below, I’d love to hear!
For those who know someone fighting or going through a tuff time, continue to give them love, support, and check-in on them periodically. Blessings to you all and tune in for tomorrow’s blog post for some fun inspiration!
Leave a Reply